I’m not perfect. Nor am I a perfect parent. Though I do try. I want to be the best parent I can be. More than anything else, being the best mum I can for my children is the most important thing in my life.
In the 10 and a half years since I became a parent, every decision I have ever made has had the good of my children at its centre. In fact, for the 10 years it took me to become a parent, I thought a lot about parenting and my values and what was important to me – and important to pass on to my children.
That, I believe, is how it should be. Becoming a parent – no matter how one comes to it – is the most important thing a person will ever do. How a parent treats a child will have profound reverberations and repercussions for generations to come. That’s not hyperbole. That’s fact.
Ireland is going to the polls a fortnight from tomorrow (November 10th) to vote on a proposed referendum to the Irish Constitution. This has not come about because our government is committed to children and because we, the Irish people, have clamoured for years to have the rights of children enshrined in our Constitution. No. This referendum is taking place because the Irish government has been shamed in to it by the UN.
Ireland signed the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child over 22 years ago, yet we have done nothing to ensure that our laws are in line with it .
This proposed referendum is a mealy-mouthed sop to the people of Ireland so that the government can say ‘See? We gave you a referendum on the Rights of the Child!’
Honestly, it’s like giving a barefoot child a pair of socks with holes in them – it’s better than nothing, but not a whole lot better.
The referendum should address all the articles of the CRC and it doesn’t. As one (small) example, Article 42 of the CRC states:
“States Parties undertake to make the principles and provisions of the Convention widely known, by appropriate and active means, to adults and children alike.”
And yet, I have never walked into a school or a Garda Station or a library or a church or any other place where children gather and seen the Rights of a Child displayed. (They are, however, displayed in my own home – UNICEF produced a beautiful, clear poster years ago which we have and which is stuck up – at child height – in our hall).
One of the other things that really bothers me about the proposed amendment is the way that the constitution is supposed to be flexible in order to accommodate the wording of any future law. Surely our constitution is supposed to be the instrument on which our laws are based, not a malleable document that should bend to accommodate our laws?! Shouldn’t our laws be based on our constitution and not vice-versa?
Another thing that bothers me about the proposed wording is this notion of ‘the best interests of the child’…..who gets to decide what the best interests of the child are? A panel of ‘experts’? People the child has never met before? People the child has known for all (or the majority) of his or her life? Or just one person? It’s not spelled out and it needs to be.
If I voted ‘Yes’ in this referendum, I would not be able to look my children in the eye – because I would know that I would not have done my best for them. My children deserve better than what this referendum is offering them. So do yours. So does every child on this island – and those who are yet to be.